Whooaa Nellie!

Well gang, college football is back, and so is Willard. As you know, Bonnie and I were married in the middle of the football season last year, so Willard refused to call me with his prognostications. He told me that he read in the Bible that the men of Israel were not to go to war the first year that they were married, so he figured I shouldn't be bothered with blogging his prognostications. He, however, is excited about this season because his beloved Dawgs are ranked #1 and has called me from the Sac n' Suds with his picks for this opening weekend of College Football. So, without delay, and with no further adieu: Here are Willard's Winners...

North Carolina State vs. South Carolina: The Wolves from the north will wander to the southern feasting grounds hunting for a few chickens to devour. Coach Spurrier's Pullets have strengthened their coop over the last few years, and are ready to come to scratch. The Wolfpack will encircle Columbia, but Spurrier's Fightin' Chickens will peck their way to a victory.

Willard's Winner: South Carolina

Wake Forest vs. Baylor: The Demon Deacons of Wake Forest have called a special meetin' to discuss the activities of the pastors in training at Baylor. The Deacon offensive committee will inspect the Preacher's philosophy on football, and find it liberal at giving up points.

Willard's Winner: Wake Forest

USC vs. Virginia: The boys from Troy will load their ships heavy with armor and swords setting sail to raid Charlottesville. The Queen's men defended the Queen quite well last year, but their most valiant Cavalier has moved on to the senior league. The Cavaliers with defend their castle valiantly, but the Trojans will steal away with a win. Willard's Winner: Them danged ole Trojans

Akron vs. Wisconsin: Willard's Winner: Whoever is not forced to watch this game!

Whoa Nellie! the Donnybrook GAME OF THE WEEK!

Alabama vs. Clemson: The Crimson Pachyderms from Tuscaloosa will travel I-20 to Death Valley trying to stomp on Coach Bowden and his Cheetahs. The Crimson Pachyderms have mad a lot of noise with their elongated snouts the last couple of seasons, but Cheetahs will run all around them this weekend. Willard's Winner: Clemson

Last, but certainly not least:

Georgia Southern vs. Georgia: The Screamin' Eagles of Georgia Southern are flying north to the Junk Yard looking to pluck Coach Richt's chances for a National Championship right out of his hands. The Dawgs are a few pups shy of their usual pack, but are ready to cancel the Eagles' flight plans. The Eagles will claw and peck a bit, but won't have any of the magical waters of Eagle creek to refresh them. All they will see is a pack of wild hounds and some tall hedges to hem them in. Willard's Winner: Georgia!

You might have noticed the picture at the top. Willard wanted me to tell you about his best friend BillyJoe. BillyJoe entered the Redneck Olympics this year. He competed in the Individual Mud Hole Belly Flop. This was his first Olympics and he came away with the Gold (plated) Trophy! Way to go BillyJoe!